Underlying all this is the belief that men are worse than women, and that they could be better if they were more like women. Men are immature, irresponsible, emotionally unavailable, unhygienic. Really, why would anyone want one? This view has become completely mainstream.
Well, to men, women are un-fun, nagging, neurotic, needy, and fussy. But we want them anyway. Women are terrible at dealing with spiders, but that doesn't make men think they're better than women overall.
One thing about that Coldplay incident: there's a woman that got caught too.
This is such a disingenuous statement, all straight women I know are fun, silly and would love to be the less fussy one in a relationship. They just have to misfortune to date men who through societal conditioning refuse to pick up any of the mental and emotional labour. The world would be a much better place if young boys instead of being told ew don't be like a girl, don't cry, don't be soft and were instead praised for their thoughtfulness, their ability to anticipate someone else's needs just like girls are forced to do. The reason the mainstream view of men are doing worse is because the empirical data to show they are worse off, they are achieving less academically, they are more lonely and this is all while benefiting from the patriarchal system which makes it easier for them to earn more, get jobs, be believed etc etc. Maybe instead of dismissing women as nagging or neurotic you should take a cold hard look at yourself and think maybe the problem here is not that women need too much or fuss too much but that you are simply not showing up enough.
A popular NYT piece on hetero pessimism/fatalism feels like our culture's consensus class rubber-stamping the notion that men and women should withdraw from one another romantically. Or at least, it feels like a step in that direction. Sad face.
Apps like Tea have good intentions and a positive upside. But they increase the social risk men accept when dating, increase it a lot. When the expected reward is less than the risk, people say no. So apps like Tea will cause more men to withdraw from dating women. Some of these will be genuinely shitty men who are being held accountable, but some will be decent men who just had the bad luck of being misread, or stumbled over an awkward situation. Then their reputations are greatly harmed. And not just their reputations in the dating scene, but in professional and local communities as well.
Both of these are weight being added to a case where America devolves into something like South Korea, a dying society of loveless, asexual isolation. There's a lot of fuel laid on this kindling already. Generative AI might transform the labor market, maybe. But it already has two killer apps-- porn and chatbots. These have been the killer apps since the beginning of the Gen AI wave a few years ago, and every month they get better.
Yes, you have to allow dating to be messy or else many guys will get Aziz Ansari'd, but without a public forum to provide a defense. It's even worse than Yelp. How long before they get sued?
I can imagine a guy reading the NYT piece and all the other "men are bad" writing out there, throwing up his hands, and saying, "Fine, forget it!" Plenty of entertainment out there to fill your time with, and we're not the ones with the biological clock ticking.
Underlying all this is the belief that men are worse than women, and that they could be better if they were more like women. Men are immature, irresponsible, emotionally unavailable, unhygienic. Really, why would anyone want one? This view has become completely mainstream.
Well, to men, women are un-fun, nagging, neurotic, needy, and fussy. But we want them anyway. Women are terrible at dealing with spiders, but that doesn't make men think they're better than women overall.
One thing about that Coldplay incident: there's a woman that got caught too.
This is such a disingenuous statement, all straight women I know are fun, silly and would love to be the less fussy one in a relationship. They just have to misfortune to date men who through societal conditioning refuse to pick up any of the mental and emotional labour. The world would be a much better place if young boys instead of being told ew don't be like a girl, don't cry, don't be soft and were instead praised for their thoughtfulness, their ability to anticipate someone else's needs just like girls are forced to do. The reason the mainstream view of men are doing worse is because the empirical data to show they are worse off, they are achieving less academically, they are more lonely and this is all while benefiting from the patriarchal system which makes it easier for them to earn more, get jobs, be believed etc etc. Maybe instead of dismissing women as nagging or neurotic you should take a cold hard look at yourself and think maybe the problem here is not that women need too much or fuss too much but that you are simply not showing up enough.
A popular NYT piece on hetero pessimism/fatalism feels like our culture's consensus class rubber-stamping the notion that men and women should withdraw from one another romantically. Or at least, it feels like a step in that direction. Sad face.
Apps like Tea have good intentions and a positive upside. But they increase the social risk men accept when dating, increase it a lot. When the expected reward is less than the risk, people say no. So apps like Tea will cause more men to withdraw from dating women. Some of these will be genuinely shitty men who are being held accountable, but some will be decent men who just had the bad luck of being misread, or stumbled over an awkward situation. Then their reputations are greatly harmed. And not just their reputations in the dating scene, but in professional and local communities as well.
Both of these are weight being added to a case where America devolves into something like South Korea, a dying society of loveless, asexual isolation. There's a lot of fuel laid on this kindling already. Generative AI might transform the labor market, maybe. But it already has two killer apps-- porn and chatbots. These have been the killer apps since the beginning of the Gen AI wave a few years ago, and every month they get better.
No bueno.
Yes, you have to allow dating to be messy or else many guys will get Aziz Ansari'd, but without a public forum to provide a defense. It's even worse than Yelp. How long before they get sued?
I can imagine a guy reading the NYT piece and all the other "men are bad" writing out there, throwing up his hands, and saying, "Fine, forget it!" Plenty of entertainment out there to fill your time with, and we're not the ones with the biological clock ticking.
I... Think the owners of Tea are getting sued either way at this point.
https://x.com/ZTobias114838/status/1948781407859323395